Businesses spend millions of dollars on advertisements trying to earn your trust. But trust can’t be bought, only familiarity can be bought. And familiarity is not trust.
Marketing agencies have learned that people won’t buy things from people they don’t trust. So salesman worldwide have made it their goal to build trust as soon as possible.
But trust can’t be built in thirty seconds, over a television screen or in person, but familiarity can; so they’ve convinced you it’s okay to replace trust with familiarity, mainly because that can be sold and repeated.
They think if you can just recognize their name, logo, or slogan (or corny jokes and mascots), then you are more likely to trust them and do business with them.
And I think there is some truth to that, but not because it’s trust. It’s not trust; it’s manipulation to urge people to take risks.
Trust is putting all your eggs in a basket and handing the basket over to someone else.
Trust is climbing into the passenger seat, happily.
Trust is letting go.
Trust is recognizing that somebody else is better equipped to the job for you and they are going to help you be your best, regardless of who benefits, because they care for you.
But that’s why trust has been redefined. You can’t buy that, manipulate it, or systematize it.
Real trust isn’t handed out after thirty second pitches, oh no. It’s forged in the fires of life, through time and commitment, and comes as a natural result—a result that you can’t hardly stop.
That kind of trust can’t be bought or manipulated, and it can’t exist outside of integrity. You can’t trust someone who changes all the time, who has his interest at hand.
A lot of business people try to build trust using tactics: talking a lot, charming with their stories or humor or by entertaining and having a good time together.
Most people stumble through life trusting whoever is most persuasive, funny, charming, or likable. Some people are suckers for intellectual manipulations (look how much I know! You should trust me!). Others for charming manipulations (see how funny I am! You should trust me!).
But in the business of life there is only one way forward, and that is to function with complete integrity and expect the same of everyone you work with. Otherwise, you have nothing to trust.
You either live in this modern manipulation, a sucker for the next scheme; or you plant your flag in the ground of ethics and set your expectation higher and hold out for others to prove to you their character, and you place your trust in them.
This is not a calling to perfection; it’s a calling to genuine connection, honest openness and vulnerability that leads to deep reliance and confidence.
In a world where we are pulled at from every angle, the only way to live successfully isn’t to become an island, but to open yourself up to those who have earned your real trust, knowing that real trust is earned, not manipulated.
“Trust, but verify.” ~Ronald Reagan
“Trust is the glue of life. It's the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It's the foundational principle that holds all relationships.” ~Stephen Covey